How to Manage Anxiety, Stress, Meltdown and Other Crises Under COVID-19

Art By BP

I came across the books by Lisa Damour, Ph.D., an American clinical psychologist and author specializing in the development of teenage girls and young women. She gives advice on how to behave and what to do when different types of crises appear in our lives, including COVID-19.

How to Manage Stress Under COVID-19

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/How-to-Manage-Stress-Under-COVID-19-English-1.pdf English

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/How-to-Manage-Stress-Under-COVID-19-Spanish.pdf  Español

How to Manage Anxiety Under COVID-19

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/How-to-Manage-Anxiety-Under-COVID-19-English-1.pdf English

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/How-to-Manage-Anxiety-Under-COVID-19-Spanish.pdf Español

How to Manage a Meltdown

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Damour-How-to-Manage-a-Meltdown-1.pdf English

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/05/Damour-Co%CC%81mo-Manejar-una-Crisis.pdf Español

When a Teens Friend is In Crisis

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/When-a-Teens-Friend-is-In-Crisis-English.pdf English

https://www.drlisadamour.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/When-a-Teens-Friend-is-In-Crisis-Spanish.pdf Español

Lisa Damour

https://www.drlisadamour.com/

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lisa_Damour 

How about I can't hear a word you are saying?

“Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood” 

by Lisa Damour

Lisa Damour, Ph.D., “pulls back the curtain on the teenage years and shows why your daughter’s erratic and confusing behavior is actually healthy, necessary, and natural. Untangled explains what’s going on, prepares parents for what’s to come, and lets them know when it’s time to worry.”

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/25614847-untangled

Art by BP

“Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls” 

by Lisa Damour

“An urgently needed guide to the alarming increase in anxiety and stress experienced by girls from elementary school through college, from the New York Times bestselling author of “Untangled”

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/40242278-under-pressure

Art by BP

The more we get together

Together, together

The more we get together

The happier we'll be…

Joy of Learning a New Language Later in Life

Ecuador

I’m not saying it is easy. It has been three years already and I’m still learning my third/fourth language - Spanish. Polish is my first language, English is my second, now Spanish is my third, and Russian is my distant fourth.

Columbia

My husband and I were traveling to the South and Central America a lot and when our daughter joined us one day we decided that “enough is enough” and that we have to be able to converse with the locals we meet there. We also wanted to feel more a part of the culture, not just the tourists.

Ecuador

We started learning Spanish with absolute “0” knowledge of the language in summer 2017. We immersed ourselves in Antigua, a small town in Guatemala, signed for a Spanish language program, Monday to Friday, 8 am till 12 pm for one-to-one instructions and afternoon group activities. We lived with a local family who did not speak a word of English. At first, we used google translator to ask basic questions. It was really tough at the beginning and hard to do even simple homework. Yes, I know, I’m an educator but when an educator becomes a student, it’s not an easy adjustment.

Ecuador

Columbia

After one month of studying and interacting with the locals, we were able to order food, pay the bill, take a bus, visit nearby attractions, or have a simple conversation with our host family. We repeated the immersion program two more times, once returning to the same school and family in the summer of 2018, and the second time a similar arrangement in Quito, Ecuador. Since the beginning of our adventure with Spanish, we connected with the native teachers by taking skype classes weekly, doing Duolingo daily, or conversing with locals during our trips to Peru, Spain, and Columbia. Fast forward three years and I can understand a simple conversation, read a passage, or write a message. Not impressive, I know. I am still a long way from feeling comfortable using Spanish.

Ecuador

Columbia

Learning a language later in life is a slow process but it is one of the best ways to power your brain. It’s known that learning anything new is very good for the adult brain. Sadly I often forget vocabulary, I look for a particular word during an important conversation, lose a point I am trying to explain. On the bright side, if you know two languages well learning a third or fourth is supposed to be easier. That gives me hope that one day I will have a flourished conversation with a native speaker and enhances my joy of learning. In the meantime, I look forward to our next trip to a Spanish speaking country.

Ecuador

At this point, I can happily say I am reasonably comfortable to ask questions, get directions, share my favorite recipes, or exchange a book recommendation in Spanish. After returning from our last trip to Columbia I feel like there were days when I spoke a decent amount of Spanish. It amazes me that so many Americans who travel to South or Central America speak no or little Spanish. Enough to say my daughter who is an 8 grader in NYC is not being taught Spanish as a second language. What is there about Americans that makes them think that knowing their own language is all they need? Spanish is the second language in the USA. There are 52 million Hispanophones who speak Spanish as a first or second language in the US making the United States the second-largest Hispanophone country in the world after Mexico. There are about 500 million Hispanophones worldwide. (Source: Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hispanophone)

Columbia

My and my husband’s goal now is to help our daughter to reach the proficiency level in the Spanish language. I can’t tell you what a joy it is to hear my daughter conversing with the native speakers, chatting with the local scouts, or playing games freely where the Spanish language is not a barrier anymore.

Columbia

A long term goal for myself is to read books in original. On my, list I have “Don Quixote” by Miguel de Cervantes, “One Hundred Years of Solitude” by Gabriel García Márquez, “Like Water for Chocolate” by Laura Esquivel, “The Shadow of the Wind” by Carlos Ruiz Zafon, “The Green House” by Mario Vargas Llosa or Falcó novels by Arturo Pérez-Reverte Gutiérrez.

The Best Way to Learn a New Language

Columbia, 2020

Learning a new language may seem daunting at first, but it can be very rewarding and fun if you learn it in the most effective way. One of the rules of thumb says - when something is challenging, the best approach is to find a better way to do it. For instance, I really wanted to speak Spanish, but I knew that learning it from New York wouldn’t be very effective, so I searched for another solution. Many people learn a new language in high school, but don’t get far and quickly forget what they learned because the teacher is usually not a native-speaker, which means that he or she teaches slowly, has an accent, knows little about the culture of the language, and does not know as many vocabulary words as a native. Instead of giving up on your language education from school, learn abroad, and immerse yourself in the culture to make the language learning more interesting and engaging. 

Spain, 2020

If you decide to learn a language in a different country, don’t miss the opportunity to live with a host family to get involved in their everyday life and culture. It makes learning easier and more effective because living with locals will help you relate to what you are learning, force you to think and communicate in the new language and make the learning real and necessary for survival. For example, when I studied Spanish in Guatemala, I needed to use the language constantly to communicate with local people, ask for directions, buy food and goods, or just to have a friendly conversation. When I and my parents came to our host family house on the first day, we could not speak a single word in Spanish and had to use Google Translate to communicate. The host family and we took turns speaking into Google Translate so we could understand our questions and answers. As time progressed, we got better and soon were able to understand whole sentences and have full conversations. We had a remarkable experience with our host family - especially, the elderly lady, who made great typical Guatemalan food and took care of our needs, was extremely kind, helpful, and cared for us almost as if we were her grandchildren. Because of our strong bond with her, when we decided to come back the next summer, we pleaded to stay with her again. Another great thing about being with a host family was that we got the opportunity to meet with other language learners in that home. We practiced Spanish with them, gave each other advice, and played Spanish board games together.

Spain and Columbia, 2020

When in a foreign country, try to do something engaging so that you will want to learn or even return. For example, if you are learning Spanish and decide to go to a Central American country, you may want to try making chocolate with local people, buying food from a local market, going zip-lining, seeing ancient ruins, hiking on a volcano, or seeing beautiful exotic plants and animals. Young learners usually have many memorable and fun experiences from studying abroad which enables them to realize that studying a new language is not as difficult as it seems. As with all types of academic pursuits, learning a language is most effective when it is engaging and enjoyable. Studying should not be too intense because this would make the learner dislike the subject. When my family and I traveled to Guatemala and Ecuador to learn, we did four hours of one-to-one tutoring every day and in the afternoons, we explored the town, different tourist attractions, and culture; or just enjoyed talking to the locals. From my experience, I can recommend the small town of Antigua in Guatemala and Ecuador’s capital, Quito, as great places to study Spanish because they are safe and affordable, the people there are very kind and easy-going, and they have many language schools, accommodations, and restaurant options.

Columbia, 2020

The best way to learn a new language is to go abroad, but if you don’t have that option, you can also try to make new friends who speak the language you want to learn, write to a pen pal, read articles or watch movies in that language, go to a restaurant and order in the foreign language, teach yourself, break your learning down and learn a different topic each week, or in other words, immerse yourself in the language. It is important not to be hindered to speak even if you make mistakes and to learn a language “lento pero seguro,” which means slowly but surely. Don't give up learning because you will forget what you have already learned with so much hard work. Take a small step every day, and over time you will learn an amazing amount of vocabulary and grammar. After you return home from your trip, keep practicing the language. You can do this by taking online classes with native speakers, finding people who speak the language, and keeping in contact with friends from the country you visited. Because of my method of learning, I was able to learn Spanish almost effortlessly.

In conclusion, traveling abroad to learn a language has many benefits - it is interesting, cost-effective, and helps the student to become culturally conscious. Most of all, it is very efficient and enjoyable. I had an unforgettable experience of learning abroad and benefited greatly from the many advantages of learning through immersion. Hopefully, if you travel abroad to learn a language, you will also find this an incredible experience.

Teach Your Child to Take a Chance Swiftly

Parents!

Teach your child to take a chance wisely but swiftly.

There are many chances in our life that come and go. You as a parent can teach your child to take them, how not to be afraid of them, how to be careful, wise but swift. It would be never enough to give your child a fish to survive. It is much better to give your child a tool, a fishing robe instead, and teach him how to use it to thrive in his life.

Kobe Yamada created a short story where he explains the whole concept in a pure and affirmative way. In an introduction he asks questions and writes:

“What do you do with a chance?” Especially one that seems too big or too wild or just out of reach?  Do you hold back? Do you act like you don't care? Do you let it slip away?

This is the story of some remarkable chances and the child who doesn't know quite what to do with them. But the more chances come around the more the child's fascination grows. And then, one day, a little courage makes all the difference in the world.

This is a story for anyone, at any age, who has ever wanted something, but was afraid of risking too much to get it. It's a story to inspire you to embrace the chances that come into your life. Because you never know when the chance, once taken, might be the one to change everything.”

The same author created "What do you do with an idea?" or "What do you do with a problem?"

And now comes the story.

"What do you do with a Chance?" 

 Written by Kobe Yamada. 

Illustrated by Mae Besom

"One day I got a chance.

It just seemed to show up. 

It acted like it knew me, as if it wanted something.

I didn't know why it was here. 

"What do you do with a chance?" I wondered.

It fluttered around me. 

It brushed up against me. 

It's circled me as if you wanted me to grab it. 

I started to reach for it, but I was unsure and pulled back. 

And so it flew away.

I thought about it a lot. I wished I had taken my chance. 

I realized I had wanted it, but I still didn't know if I had the courage.

When another chance came around, I wasn't so sure. 

But I decided to try.

I went to reach for it, but I missed it and fell. I was embarrassed. 

I felt foolish. It seemed like everyone was looking at me.

I decided I never wanted to feel this way again.

So after that, whenever a chance came along, I ignored it.

And the more I ignored them the less they came around.

Until one day I noticed that I had seen at once in quite a while. 

It was as if they had it all disappeared. 

I started to worry, "What if I don't get another chance?"

I know I acted like I didn't care, but the truth was, I did. 

I still wanted to take a chance, but I was afraid. 

And I wasn't sure if I would ever be brave enough.

Then I thought, "Maybe I don't have to be brave all the time. 

Maybe I just need to be brave for a little while at the right time."

I realized it was up to me.

I promised myself that if I ever got another chance, I wasn't going to hold back. 

If I had got another chance, I was going to be ready.

Then, one seemingly ordinary day, 

I saw something shining far off in the distance. 

"Is it possible?" I hoped. "Could this be a chance?"

I had to find out. I ran as hard and as fast as I could toward it.

I don't know how to explain it, but the second I let go of my fire I was full of excitement.

It wasn't that I was no longer afraid, 

but now my excitement was bigger than my fear.

As I got closer, I could see that this was a really huge chance!

But this time I was ready. 

As it came by, I reached out and grabbed it. 

I held on with all my might.

It felt so good to soar, to fly, to be free!

I now see that when I hold back, I miss out.

 And I don't want to miss out. 

There's just so much I want to see and do and discover.

So what do you do with a chance? 

You take it… 

because it just might be a start of something incredible.

What do chances become? 

New friendships, exciting opportunities, and daring discoveries. 

Chances are invitations to grand adventures, 

tickets to unforgettable experiences, 

and doors to whole new worlds. 

Chances help you see who you are, what you want, and where you want to go.

So, what will you do with your chance? Now that's up to you."