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Thursday, January 24, 2019

Help your Child to Deal with Envy, Jealousy, and Competition

 We feel envious when someone has something we want; 

We feel jealous when we’re afraid of losing what we already have; 

We compete constantly measuring ourselves against others.

We feel envious when someone has something we want.
There’s benefit in accepting envy because the right kind of envy can make you work harder for something. “If you are curious and compassionate with yourself when you feel envious or jealous, you may learn that there is something important missing in your relationships or career. You can then use that insight to make changes in your life that help you get or keep what is valuable to you,” Appio says.
Envy can easily turn into jealousy because it narrows our perspective and creates a sense of scarcity. But with benign envy - the kind of envy that hasn’t yet devolved into jealousy - you simply recognize someone else’s fortune and want it for yourself.
We feel jealous when we’re afraid of losing what we already have.
We only feel jealous when we think that we are in a direct competition with the person we are jealous of. A student who feels jealous when one of his schoolmates is praised by the teacher is actually afraid of losing the status to that competitor.
The more jealous you feel towards a person the more weak you think you are compared to him. If someone kept talking behind your back and kept saying bad things about you then don’t feel bad because in many cases this can be regarded as a verbal confession that you are better than him. If you found yourself feeling jealous of other people then consider it the time to start changing things about yourself instead of criticizing or hating them.
We all might feel jealous at certain points of our lives but those who really understand jealousy will try to fix their problems while others will only become envious and full of hatred.
We compete constantly measuring ourselves against others.
Competitive feelings can trigger penetrating thinking of self-reflection. When we see someone whose is doing better we ask ourselves what fatal flaw prevents us from generating the impressive output they do. Aren’t we’re talented enough, or are we worse, or lazy, or shy?

Steps to deal with competition in life
  1. Act gracefully. You can't guarantee that you will always succeed, but you can take charge of how you feel.
  2. Practice empathy. ...
  3. Use your sense of humor. ...
  4. Avoid and recognize covert competition. ...
  5. Deal with others who play dirty. ...
  6. Keep some information private to reduce competition. ...
  7. Create the right kind of environment.

Check “The Power of Positive Thinking” a self-help book by Norman Vincent Peale

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